Changing Lives: "I want children to lead the lives they love."
Howard Thompson “had it all”: He had a rewarding and respected career, nice cars, high-quality suits, a comfortable community, a supportive wife, a teenage daughter, and two young sons. Yet in the fall of 2008, he gave up all the comforts and security of his job and even his house. He moved his family to Bryn Athyn, Pennsylvania to become a student in the Academy of the New Church Theological School. What was the reason for this bold move?
The seeds of his decision had been growing for years, but he traces some of the earliest inspiration to a memory of his older brother, Ed. Howard vividly recalls hearing a conversation between Ed and his parents. Ed was expressing a desire to take some time off from college. He had a dream of supporting himself and seeing the states by driving a truck across the country. Howard still remembers the way his brother was forcefully denied this opportunity with the question, “Why would you throw away all those years of private school to become a truck driver?” Six years later, Ed took his own life.
The memory of his brother’s thwarted ambitions never left Howard; he developed a passionate belief that all children should have the chance to do what they love. As a young adult, Howard decided that he would try to take advantage of every opportunity—something his brother no longer had the chance to do. For a time, he thought he’d join the Navy. Later, he wondered about the Peace Corps or a political career. He followed none of these paths, though, and he soon found himself immersed in the day-to-day priorities of his business, managing insurance programs for independent schools.
Through his business, Howard learned of a New Church community in Bryn Athyn. He noticed something positive about the people from this town—that they seemed to “walk the walk.” When the time came to choose a kindergarten for his first child, Chelsea, he and his wife Debra decided to ask whether the Bryn Athyn Church School admitted children who were not members of the New Church. The answer was “yes,” so Howard and Debra began having meetings with the school principal. On the way home from the last of these meetings, Debra was quiet. Finally, she turned to Howard and said, “What this school offers is everything I would ever want for my children.” At this point, Howard and Debra only thought of the impact that a good school would have on their daughter. “We had no idea what the impact on our lives would be,” he said later.
After attending a series of newcomer classes, Howard and Debra were invited to join a doctrinal class, where they began a deeper study of the tenets of the New Church. Howard found that he easily accepted the idea of one God; in fact, it’s what he had always believed. Even the idea of the Second Coming did not startle him. It made sense to him that the Second Coming would not literally occur in the future, but rather happens within people as they invite the Lord in. After a few years, Howard told Debra that he was ready to become baptized. She had been thinking the same thing, so with their daughter (the two boys had not yet been born), the young family was baptized into the New Church. After the baptism, Howard thanked everyone for coming. His confident delivery prompted the Rev. Jeremy Simons to say, “Howard, you speak very well. Have you ever thought of becoming a minister?”
This question stayed in the back of Howard’s mind for many years. Howard and Debra continued to meet with the same group of couples in their doctrinal class, and their affection for the New Church community continued to grow. When the first Journey Campaign began, Howard watched with awe the power of a whole community actively studying and trying to follow the Ten Commandments. Occasionally, he would recall the question asked of him on his baptism day. He also watched the way his daughter, Chelsea, was making the most of her young life, taking every opportunity available to her.
Chelsea’s courage inspired Howard to reflect on his own life. He asked himself, “Am I the best husband I can be? The best father, neighbor or friend? Could I be less judgmental of others?” Finally, he realized that although he was making a good living, he still had room to grow. After much prayer and soul-searching, and after speaking with the Dean of the Theological school, he decided just to go for it. He decided to ignore the inner critic that scolded, “Why would you throw away all this comfort and start again?”
Now, Howard is in his third year of Theological School. He is scheduled to graduate in 2011, the same year Chelsea will graduate from the Academy of the New Church Girls School. His life is busier than ever, but he does not regret his decision. Recently, while strolling through Macy’s, he saw a group of men examining some expensive suits. Howard remembered what it felt like to wear and buy suits like that. With relief, he realized that those physical things no longer have the same appeal to him (though he admits that he’s still referred to as the “best-dressed theolog”). Howard is not sure exactly what he will do when he graduates, but his life’s guiding mission remains clear. With shining eyes and conviction in his voice he says, “I want children to lead the lives they love.”
